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I have so many thoughts in my head. things don't make sense. too much talking. people spreading things that aren't true. school is shit. work is tolerable. I don't sleep anymore. I don't want to bother anyone. I make things worse. lowkey really want to hurt myself but that would be starting over again with being three years free from a blade. crying every day and night the past week. I can't get comfortable with a friend without it being taken the wrong way, and then they're just gone. I joke about killing myself. but lately it's not sarcastic. being told "it could be worse". yeah well I'm at my worst right now.
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